Grosvenor have finally caught their man! After months of seeing a shortage of biscuits in the office, the thief has been apprehended. Grosvenor Managing Director Ben Olson, whilst himself enjoying a coffee and biscuit (now it is safe to do so), announced that the culprit is none other than Adam Holmes, the Technical & Operations Manager. It was no surprise to many of the office staff, who have been reluctant to bring in biscuit treats for fear of them being pinched:
“I popped out for lunch and half of this giant tin of biscuits had gone when I returned. I knew it was Adam, I could see the crumbs all over his jumper, but he denied it anyway. Then he had the gall to help himself to another one, right in front of all of us, whilst suggesting I may have eaten them all. They should throw away the key” – Dawn, Admin Manager
“It’s not his fault, I really do think he may have a problem. Nobody eats that many biscuits, for that long, without developing some sort of physical or mental dependency. No wonder he’s always in the gym…without the exercise I doubt he’d be able to move in a month” – Alan, Paraplanner
“You can always tell when someone has brought biscuits in because Adam appears every 10 minutes for a ‘chat’. Usually, he has a very simple query (which we all know he knows the answer to) as he wanders over, grabs as many biscuits as he can carry and saunters back to his room as if nothing has happened. I’ve been here over 20 years and I’ve hardly had the chance to eat any non-savoury items in the office since Adam jointed in 2016. I’ve forgotten what those ‘nice’ sugary biscuits even taste like now. He says he doesn’t like sweet food. What a load of Horlicks” – Lesley, Admin
Having finally pleaded guilty Adam will now face a fictitious court on 25th March 2022. Alongside other like-minded naughty (but very fake) criminals he will be attending the Jail & Bail 2022 which is run by Children’s Hospice South West. Rest assured there will be no biscuits on site and Adam will only be released on bail if the charity receives £999. Calling on business partners, staff, family and friends Adam will need as much support as possible if he can finally breakthrough the biscuit haze and be allowed back in the office. Any donations will be gladly received via this link – https://www.justgiving.com/fundraising/adamholmes1
To find out more about the event please follow this link – https://www.chsw.org.uk/event/jail-bail-bristol-2022
Children’s Hospice South West provide hospice care for children and families who live in the South West from their three hospices across the region; Barnstable, Bristol and St Austell. They provide care for children and young people aged 0 – 21 years with life-limiting or life-threatening conditions which mean that they are not expected to survive into adulthood.
For over 25 years, their care and support has provided a wide range of services for families in the South West including specialist palliative care, respite for the entire family, a sibling service for brothers and sisters, end of life care and a bereavement service for as long as they are needed.
For more information please visit www.chsw.org.uk
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